Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Latest Dictionary Definitions!Divorce: Future tense of marriage (makes me think twice now!)
Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.(I so dig into this...no offence to the fools reading this!)
Lecture: An art of transferring information from notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either (hmm...would be much easier if they could mind read...at least we could cut down the ridiculously high fees..)
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present (bingo!)
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece (hmm..i think i am good at this!)
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power (Yeah! Female Power!)
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on. (always knew those rooms were jinx!)
Classic: A book that people praise, but do not read (yup...interesting how they get away with not knowing what the hell it's abt)
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight (hmmm...mine's quite expensive!)
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life. (think this is true for some people in my office!)
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouths. (well...i think they should still at least cover their mouths...men...when will they ever learn manners!)
Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. (oh..so that what it means...always wonder why some people high up there keep using this!)
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide nothing can be done together (this is like the gospel truth)
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes (men are so creative...dn't u think so??)
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life only to be spoken of when dead. (he'll be lucky if anyone still bothers to speak abt him...nowadays...deaths by Sting rays and other unique manners are more the hot topics!)
Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. (And we do so much to foster foreign relations...hmm??..)
Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich (it's all in the 'will')
Father: A banker provided by nature (god is fair!)
Criminal: A guy no different from the rest…except he got caught (yup...dumb guy who knows not to cover his tracks!)
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early (what abt those who are never around?)
Politician: One who shakes your hands before elections and your confidence after. (not really...in some instances... they are too busy bickering about paper submissions and childish arguements!)
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.(double edge-sword...esp in Singapore!)
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Shari, The Beauty With Brains
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